SKIT : A FUTURE FOR THE POOR?

Where's the future, Do they still have one?
As time ticks, hours turns into days, can they still hope on?
Do they still ever get a chance to smile, where does their destiny really lie?
A soul so empty, yet so pure they carry
The sufferings we go through yet are still unending.
So much laughs for the rich, while the heart of the poor still bleeds.
Stern faces, so cold, these kids could hardly cheer
No matter how hard they try to stand, they still end up in a chair.
Barely nothing to eat, can't even shelter these smiling ribs
They get a glance at hope, you can see their bright cheese.
I can only wish and pray that these sorrows be by gone,
The future of these kids have been stalled in a dungeon.

- MIKADO.

Hopeless Love

"There comes a moment in life when time loses its patience,when the clock ticks faster and we are not able to catch up anymore,
There comes a time when all that once mattered to us and held the centre of our universe gets pulled down by gravity,
A time when friends that promised never to leave us,leave without a reason,
A time when lovers leave without a goodbye,
A time when letting go is all we have to do to keep our sanity,
A time when nothing but the happiness we ourselves can give to our person becomes all that matters,
A time when love would no longer give happily ever after,
A time when love would forever cease to exist 'cos maybe then,tears and pain would forever vanish for what is love when it is just like hate and what is it if it is not guaranteed?"

She dropped her pen,closed her diary and drifted off as nature took its course.

"Ifedolapo,ifeeeeeeee"

She woke up to the voice of her mother who had raised the curtains and was tugging slightly at the duvet covering her. She blinked severally to adjust her pupils to the amount of light entering and finally gave a yawn as she greeted her mother.

"E kaaro maami"

"Kaaro ifemi,how was your night?"Her mother asked.

"My night was fine maami,I slept like never before."She said and averted her eyes because she knew she had just told a lie. Her night wasn't fine,her night had never been fine. From the unending nightmares to the tears that soiled her pillow every night,it had always been a cycle of depression. She wasn't fine,she hoped she would be one day.

"Adupe lowo olorun. Your father called though,he asks that you come over for a visit tomorrow. I guess it's high time you met your other family. He wants you to be at Kolapo's welcome party tomorrow also."

Ife stopped to think about that. "Other family?"She thought. Her mother had said that like her father had two families when in fact,he had just one,one that had never included them and never will. They weren't his family,they had never been. She wasn't even legitimate,you could call her a bastard,she had no father,okay,maybe she did but of what point was an excuse of a father who merely existed,not to her though,just to her mother who still carried a touch for him. They had always been outcasts,she was the only reason her father recognized her mother as a human being. Her father impregnated her mother at an early age of 19,an orphan with no family to call hers,a "reject" as her so called relatives had washed their hands off her immediately her parents died in a ghastly motor accident. When she told him about the pregnancy,she got a slap 'cos that was the only reaction that could be given to such a mistake on her part. He had called her all sort of names and even left her but later came back to accept the pregnancy as his but not without leaving her with a statement Ife later found in her diary three days ago.

"I will take responsibility for this mistake. You should have known better than get pregnant,you blackmailing bitch and naïve girl. I have a girl I want to marry,my parents picked her out for me. She is classy,from a great family,she is beautiful and she is all I want in a woman. Now know this,you are nothing and can never be anything like her. I will have a great life with her and there is nothing you can do to ruin my chances with her. This child is going to be the only reason we are bound. I will train the child in school but the child will live with you. I will support him/her in any way I can BUT you must know that I am only responsible for the child and not you."

And so,her mother deferred her admission,gave birth to her and went back to school while juggling menial works to make them survive life. And thus began her story,a child without a father,a struggling mother who never forgot her first love and her own twisted love story.
But then,he made a mistake for her mother would always be more than the woman he married. Radeke,Ife's mother was strong,strong-willed and determined. She had made a good life for them,a comfortable one even after so many years of struggling and hustling.

"Ifedolapo!ki lo n ro?you were so deep in thought. I just delivered your father's.."

"Don't mother! Don't call him my father! He is not my father."

"But he is Ife! You must not hate him,he cares for you."

"Oh,so now he does?and since when?because it seems all those while,I never noticed."

"Ife,sarcasm ill suits you,don't play that game with me. Now you are going to prepare and go visit your family tomorrow."Her mother said.

"No maami,I won't go there."

"Oh,but you will be there Ifedola,o ni ko oro si mi l'enu. Bitterness isn't going to take its root in your heart,never!"She said as she finally dragged the duvet off my body.
"Now get up!"she said authoritatively.

She stopped to look at her mother,the bitterness she so prayed for not to take root in her heart had not only taken root but had spread over the years. She watched as her mother battled with her inner strength to keep from crying. She wouldn't break down in front of her daughter,instead she would go into her room and weep silently as always. Ife wondered when the tears would end. As a child,she had always watched her mother cry from behind closed doors. Her mother would hold out a picture of the man called her father and fall apart even while holding it to her chest. She would say,"ade mi,why did you leave,you promised not to,I thought our love would be eternal". She always said the same thing every time she cried. She chased away every good man that came her way,never gave anyone any chance. Ife grew up knowing love was a mistake never to be made. Love was slowly killing her mother because every day she cried,it was like she would drop from the burden in her heart.

"Why do you still love him?" Ife asked as her mother turned to leave the room.
Her mother turned back with a surprised look on her face.

"What?"she asked.

"You heard me maami. Why do you still love that man?"

"I...but...ife..I" her mother stuttered.

"Mother he is not worth it. As a child,I watched you cry for him. You still do maami. It gets so annoying when I hear you whimper in bed when I pass by your door at midnights. You still cry yourself to sleep. Is your so called love worth it? Why maami?"

"You won't understand Ifedolapo."

"Please make me understand then,I want to."

"You can't Ife,you don't even know what love is. You have always hated the mere mention of that word. You hate romance movies,you hate novels,you don't even attend weddings,not even weddings of your friends. Ifedolapo,you don't love anyone except me. How then can you understand how love works?"

Ife looked at her with pity in her eyes,if only she knew what she was also going through. If only she knew that she had made a terrible mistake by falling for someone. If only she knew that love was just painful,pointless and overrated! But of course she knew,she just never accepted and still doesn't. Her mother had aged over the years out of fatigue,depression,sadness,
hurt and the isolation love had thrown her into.

"I do not wish to understand how it works maami. Infact you know what,fuck love!"Ife screamed.

Her mother broke down in tears, ife wanted to reach out and help her but her stubborn heart wouldn't let her. She stood back instead and watched her cry.
"Ifemi,you must understand what love is. Don't hate love,it is a beautiful thing and do not swear ever again. Fuck love,you say? Well,throw it at the man who has made us feel this way,not the harmless word itself!"she said as she walked out of the room feeling dejected.

Ife picked up a vase and threw it against the wall. Her mother was beginning to infuriate her with her tears and daily sermon about love. The woman had not still learned any lesson. Maybe the saying,"a woman who truly loves you will be angry at you for many things but will still stick around" was true 'cos her mother still prayed for her father every single day. The poor woman still carried him in her heart and that goddamn picture of his never left her bed side. Maybe she would even burn it one of these days and help her mother out of the misery she had put herself into.

"Iranu oshi,love ko,love ni. He should come and drag me to his house now."

She laid down on her bed again and pulled out the diary she took from her mother's luggage. She came across the diary three days ago and the obvious love that emanated from the feelings her mother displayed in the treasured book made Ife hate Mr Olaonipekun the more.
She opened the book and prepared to get more disgusted by her mother's undying love for her wicked father.

"I met him again on the 5th of july,he looked dashing as he looked the first day we met. He finally told me he had never been able to get me out of his head since then and that he would want to be closer to me."
And in his words,"I'm beginning to think I can't go by a day without you,I feel I'm getting addicted to you,I want to see you every second,every day."

Ife scoffed and flipped to 3 pages ahead.

"Guess what?we finally did it today,he promised to love me forever,said he wouldn't leave me,said no matter the circumstance,he would always stay with me. He said I am all he wants in a woman and vowed to always make me his just as he has done now. I love that he is my first."

"Maami used to be dumb oh"ife said angrily before she could catch the words that had dropped out of her mouth unknowingly.
She flipped on and on and finally came to the page that got her angry.

"I went to see him today,I discovered this morning that I am two months gone. He slapped me and told me to leave,never to return. "You never meant anything to me. I thought you were smarter than this,oh,what a mistake! Do you even have a brain?well,you have messed things up. I have a girl I want to spend my life with and you are not her! Just go,go away Radeke,leave!"
I couldn't believe all he said to me, Ade promised not to leave,he promised to stay. No,this isn't happening! No!"

Just that moment,Ife felt her mother's pain and decided there and then to have nothing to do with love. Her mother had really lost it and she would make her see reasons why love will never make her cry as a person.

She closed her mother's diary and picked up her own diary to write again.

"I don't understand how you can smile all day long but cry yourself to sleep at night.
How pictures never change but the people in them do. How your lover suddenly changes and how forever turns into never.

I don't understand how you can let go of something that you once thought best for you,how something you love,hurts you the same. How the people who once wanted to spend every second with you,think a few minute of their time is too much to spare.

How people make promises despite knowing how common it is for promises to be broken. How people can erase you from their lives just 'cos it is easier than working things out.
How I miss you becomes we never met.
How I love you loses its meaning and importance.

How attraction becomes irritation
How moments soon become memories.
Isn't it all f**ked up????"

She was an on her way to becoming an ice queen,she wasn't going to be like her mother.

Kitty

10 LESSEONS LEARNT IN 2015

So this is how my New Year tradition goes. I always try to write 10 lessons every New Year and I am doing this again and I will do it again next year. It’s a tradition!!! Lol

Ok about these 10 lessons, they are born out of personal experiences: triumphs and downfalls, the good, bad and the downright ugly. They may be a bit different from last year, I mean, I’m growing older in experience and knowledge too. As my birthday approached this year, there was a crippling fear in my heart about growing older. Who doesn’t want to be sweet and sixteen forever? I felt like I had not done enough. My father in particular said I thought you would be done with school and doing something with your life. People think different, but I was ashamed and beating myself up. Now I settled that with God and I have dusted my trophy rack again and again over the past few months. I’m grateful for my friends who kept reminding me and rubbing my back and convincing me that I was enough.

Lesson 1: You Don’t Have Time

The lesson here is: I don’t have time. You don’t!! There is nothing like being too young. I wish I had started out on FNL and believed in my writing and my stories and my voice. I kind of wish I had gone into a relationship earlier (maybe?) I wish I had started saving earlier. I wish I had nurtured my entrepreneurship spirit earlier. I wish I had dropped some friends earlier. I wish I had been proactive about a lot of things.

This year is going to be different. I’m taking the bull by the horn and writing off procrastination. I’m truly living and going for what I believe in and my dreams. No more startup excuses, no fears, no inhibitions.

Everyday looks mundane and the same and nothing changes yet when you look back, everything has changed.

So live like you don’t have time. Because you don’t.

Lesson 2: Never, Ever Lie to Yourself.

I’m grateful for two friends in particular in my life. Tolu brings reality home and shines a floodlight on my heart and Afoma asks the tough questions that everyone is not asking.

I can pretend and lie to everyone but once I’m not sure about the true state of things in my heart, then there is a problem.

I’m a coke (coca cola please) addict. I can be uptight. I need to slow down. I’m afraid that my writing is never going to be good enough and people won’t like my voice. I want a family; a good real loving one. My being a feminist doesn’t one bit change the fact that marriage and family makes my heart beat a little faster. There is this and that; and there is that and this.

There is a problem with the “ doctrine of confessions”. I feel like people lie to themselves and refuse to take responsibility for themselves and just confess it away. I’m not going to go into the back and forth of it but you get the idea. If you’re lazy, you’re lazy. If you need to lose weight, you need to. If you need to study harder, you need to study harder. If you need to get out of that relationship, you need to. Full stop. Period. Stop lying to yourself and do something about it.

Lesson 3: Write It Down.

How else can I preach this message? Memories are gold.

With all the hustle hard and fame mantras I hear around, there is one that makes me laugh. I can’t really quote it word for word but it’s something about how autobiographies will be written about them. How can we write an autobiography about you when you are not journaling now?

Ok fine. You don’t want to journal. But the lessons you learn, and those “lines” that strike you? The plans? The dreams? That business strategy? What God said? What you are thankful for? I think you need to be writing it down.

Write it down. Just write it and keep it. You will forget, I promise. The shortest pencil is longer than the smartest memory or so the quote goes.

Writing it down, whatever it is: reminds you, keeps you accountable, heals you and measures your growth.

Lesson 4: Take a Lesson in Trust

This is perhaps the biggest lesson. This last year, God removed all my “props” and my trust (not faith please) was really tested. I got into a new relationship, my investments caved in and people I called family really messed up and I had to drop all the baggage. I had nothing, nobody. It was like I was holding on with one finger and it was hard. Waking up and facing the day was a herculean task. I have a simple breath phrase ‘Lord, help.” Every step was my trusting God because I didn’t have another option.

I have grown in that area and right now, whether things are good or not, I know, I truly know that God is my source, my sole source. Whether it is financial, or emotional or health wise or my academics or my writing or my business, I’ve to come to trust God true and through.

Even when things are going good, I refuse to get too comfortable. I decide to step back and let God take over in the simplest things, like who’s going to provide dinner.I’m not testing God’s ability to, I’m testing my trust in His ability.

Lesson 5: Drop All that Baggage

Sophia Nelson wrote: “your spirit was not made to carry junk.” That stuck with me ever since I read it. As in, I’m not one for drama anymore. I let go of relationships because of the bickering and pain in the name of fighting for it. I let go of the emotional abuse and stress. I just needed to breathe and do that easily.

If you need to walk away, please do. If you need to tear up letters or delete messages, do that now. Stop ‘force-hanging out’ and dragging your feet. Don’t say hi or hello or pull the ‘I just wanted to check up on you’ stunt. If you need to be confrontational and talk it out, what are you waiting for? It hurts and I know the memories are a lifetime worth and the questions and fears are all up in your face.

You need to travel light if you’re going to travel fast. (That is totally my quote)

Your past is in the past and that is where it should remain (that’s mine too) Why drag the pain and hurt and upheaval into today?

Lesson 6: Do It Afraid

I’ve stepped out so much in the last year. It’s been my hardest year but also a landmark one. And trust me, fear had a chokehold on my throat.

At my party this year, all my friends talked about how I’m fierce and how I go for what I what irrespective of the obstacles and how I’m never afraid and stuff.

Oh please! I’m afraid. Fear cripples me all the way down to my toes. Waking up is a chore.

But I do it anyway. Fear has never stopped me. If I wait to stop being afraid, then I just might never do it. Inhale. Do it. Exhale. Do it. Wet sticky palms, shaky feet: do it anyway.

Step out. I promise you, even if you sink, you’ll be happy you did (in the end)

Lesson 7: Take a Chill Pill

We are too young to be unhappy. We are too young to be complicated.

I know I’m uptight. I take life seriously. And it’s a good thing. Perhaps our generation needs more of me.

But a little balance is needed now and then. My friend says the search for balance is vanity in itself. I beg to disagree. Extremes will end your life faster than you can willingly do.

I take a pause every now and then. I ask questions. I source opinions. I ask Esther for a massage. I buy a new book. I smell fresh paper. I do my nails. I take a walk. I sleepover at Tolu’s. I insult my best friend. I cook something different. I watch TBBT or 2 Broke Girls or Harry Potter. I download weird music. I miss classes and sleep to escape. I rearrange my wardrobe and wash my bathroom. I write. I breathe in. I breathe out. I go either behind the camera or in front of it. I climb to the top of cars and do my sexy dance. I splurge on myself. I build castles in the air. Most importantly, I refuse to numb out and remember to laugh at myself.

It,s tiring to beat myself up all the time. The world is doing that. Life is giving me every chance to. So let me leave all that work to the experts and pamper me a little.

Lesson 8: Do the Right Thing

It is not rocket science that doing the right thing is hard. And yes, I’m talking about the values and the standards you have. If they need to go to the bin, please thrash them quick. Don’t lie to yourself. You know what needs to change. Forget whatever anybody thinks.

Of course, the high road is lonely and not very popular. It is hard and it is denying and you don’t always get everything you want. But what you need for life is more important.

I feel like young people shoot themselves in the leg at this primetime of life. Thing is, the pain comes later. The bleeding doesn’t start now. Do not destroy what you do not have before you even have it.

Grow some standards and adopt values, the right kind. Have a backbone, a real one and learn to say no (or yes) and rock it.

Lesson 9: Look from Another Perspective

People feel like Christians are so judgmental and stuff. I dare say people are so judgmental of Christians too. Once you’re pointing fingers, it doesn’t matter which side you’re on. Calm down. Ask questions. Think till you’re at the bottom of the rabbit hole.

I’ve grown so much in this area. I’m not quick to come to conclusions. I really don’t like making excuses for people. While some people might argue that it helps your love walk, the truth is people need to take responsibility for their actions. I’ll not help nobody stay irresponsible. And if you choose to, why do I have to stay there and bear the brunt of it?

And this doesn’t apply to just people and their religion or circumstances.

For instance, I’m planning to start a new business. I wear all the caps possible. I think like the owner that I am. I think like the consumer. I think like the sales agent. In church, I think like the leader and the follower.

If you’ve ever been to the optician, there is this cool thing the optician does when he’s trying to find you a perfect pair of lens: he gives you empty frames, starts to put different lens and it’s fun (to me anyway) trying to read with all of them till you find your perfect pair.

Maybe we should try to do this with life too.

Lesson 10: No Surprises

I don’t know to paint this lesson well. Maybe it stems out of a place of numbness, maybe not.

But nothing surprises me anymore. It’s not like I make a list of all the bad things that could possibly happen (trust me, I used to) but I try to make sure nothing pulls the rug from under my feet.

I’ve come to accept the fact that life sucks and will suck and my safe haven is in my Lord and I’m good when I’m hungry or full, when I’m weak or strong, when I’m sad or happy, when I’m unloved or loved. I don’t throw tantrums anymore (I was the queen of them) I no longer point accusing fingers when things don’t go according to plan. I just move along. I’m fine if I’m happy; I’m fine if I’m sad.

I’ve learnt to face the fact of whatever is happening, accept it, feel it and find the way forward. No drama. No surprises.

I hope these have helped you. I will also advise that you try out these new year traditions thing, it will really help especially if you are a person that likes to check yourself, your successes, achievements and goals.

Also, please comment and share what you’ve learnt this year. You might just help to inspire one or two people. xoxo

VOX POP: MOUTH ODOUR

Relationship palava sef, so now it is not enough that your boo probably has another boo, you also have to worry about the rival in the mouth. Yes o! Mouth odour. How do you tell your boo or bae that he or she is a CULPRIT?

‘I will tell her the same way I will tell a fat girlfriend that she is fat. It is that simple’

Onyekachi Anyaghowa

300L, Physiology, UI

‘(LAUGHS) I can’t tell her. C’mon, she will feel so embarrassed forever. Don’t think I can tell her but she can’t even be my partner if she’s got mouth odour’

Tunde,

200L, Geography, Unilag

‘I will just tell her plainly that she has mouth odour’

Damilola ogunsanya, redeemer’s university

‘I will call him, sit him down and subtly relate this problem to him without making him ashamed and we will discuss how to combat it’

Tamara Akinloye

200L, Religious Studies, UI

‘It is very difficult to say that’

Oshokoya Melody Joy,

Redeemer’s University

‘(SMILES) I’ll buy her toothpaste on her birthday, she’ll get the gist. Or keep telling her there is someone I know that has mouth odour and how much I don’t dig it, so she would get conscious of it’

Taofeek Bello,

300L, Quantity Surveying, Unilag

INTERVIEW with Mr UI.

Seyi Evans: Happy new year readers, its great having you all in the new year. My name is Seyi Evans and welcome to another great interview session on the FACET. I have here with me the present Mr University of Ibadan (Mr U.I). And I'm sure you all want to know who this present one is and whats up with him.

Seyi Evans: Hello Boss,can we meet you?
Nimi: Errrm... My name is Onipede oluwalonimi olarinkomi, a 400level student of the department of adult education/English language.. From osun state Nigeria.. Second child of three.
Seyi:Oh wow! Great Nimi. Hmm talking to an English student here,think i have to be careful with my use of language,so i wont fall your hand abi
Nimi:Lol! Ahhba. I only minor in English.. I basically major in adult education minor in English.. I basically major in adult education
Seyi: Oh! I'm safe then..so tell us Nimi, how has it been like studying adult education?
Nimi: Well.. Ups and downs I'd say, basically from the whole shit face I get when I say the name of my department, most People are like "you would help teach my grandmother... Etc"... This actually made me have massive low self esteem, therefore I usually claim just English language, sidelining the adult education. Then when I got to my second yeah, I realized the course had more to offer, and I actually have an added advantage because I can swing both ways, and not streamlined..
Seyi: Hmm yes that's understandable,its not like when people say I'm studying medicine,law and the likes but good you didn't let that get to you much and you benefiting from it right?
Nimi: Trust me.. A whole lot... It has taught me how to help people learn, and not just enforce what I believe I know on them, rather working hand in hand with them in the learning process.
Seyi: Okay that's really cool.But I'm curious now,you gave basic details about yourself earlier but didn't mention you being the present Mr UI..are you normally this humble about it or you want to cap down your ego because you know the world would be reading
Nimi: Lol... The funny thing is, I feel quite awkward when I'm addressed as "Mr UI"... My name is Nimi, and Mr UI is just a post, when I'm gone there would be countless Mr UI's why then should I drown myself in it.. Fine I'm the current Mr University of Ibadan but my name which is unchangeable is Nimi.
Seyi Evans: Nawa o,awkward?Mr UI? I envy this humility oh. But still you are the present Mr UI and I'm sure there's been a lot to it. So how have you been coping with the attention,especially from the female fans club, haha.
Nimi: Lol.. What attention? Female what... I know not of any, I've been me basically.. Sadly I don't know of any female fan, not to talk of fans
Seyi: Like seriously now? Ha! This' a first oh. Me is your fan already so maybe you know one now. haha.Okay are you normally free with people or you the type that walks shoulder high?like maybe i should just count myself lucky to be talking with you
Nimi: Lol... Fan lol.. Indeed.... Free with people, well maybe when I'm quite close to you, because I'm shy to death which brings me down to the shoulder high part, abeg what is there to be shoulder high for? Mr UI? Abeg oh. But basically must people misunderstand me, because I'm really shy and I get tongue tied at times or I would stay mute.. Then I hear stories that I'm proud, but the best thing is I don't do the defending myself.. People that know me usually take offense on my behalf.. They go all "that playful creature?"
Seyi: Yes fan!what do you mean indeed. lol! Hmm shy? Maybe you seem shy tho cause this one that there are no female fans you know..Now that you have told us this lets hope peoples thinking towards you will change. So is there any main bae/chick with the "shy playful creature"? *coughs*
Nimi:Lmaoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo... Mother Mary is bae
Seyi: Ewo! So are you trying to say "you are single to stupor"?
Nimi: Did I?
Seyi: But realistically, mother Mary cannot be bae now so explain further, lol.
Nimi: I'm not married now
Seyi: Obviously we know,and you know what i mean oh
Nimi:*tongue out* Next question

MUST READ: Online Love, A Tragedy??

Ping ping, the sound I always wait to hear
I wake up every morning with love in my heart and lots of cheer
I stare at his face in his pictures and my face is covered with smiles
Enchanted i am, as my crush for this boy has gone the farthest miles.
Not met him yet but I feel like he's the one I've lived for
Touching his cheek, slipping my hand around his neck and whispering in his ears are things I wish for.
I sleep every night and it's no stress for me to see him in my dreams
But as reality would have it. . We're just 2 friends still yet to meet.
But I've fallen too deep, I'm in love to bits.

But then the day came when we finally got to be together
I couldn't help myself the day before, as my whole body fulled with shivers. There was anxiety, insecurities, thoughts of outfit and yet bit of laughter.
I jumped into my best pick of outfit and moved with elegance as I'll finally meet my lover.
I arrived the restaurant where we agreed to meet, I still couldn't get over the shine of his teeth.
But the moment I sighted him where he sat, my mouth was wide open and my head slowly lowered in despair.
The supposed love of my life, my online love, was all dressed without legs on a wheel chair.

- MIKADO.

FOR THE LOVE OF THE NEW YEAR

HELLO, wonderful facet blog readers.

It’s cool to write to you beautiful and handsome people after a looooong hiatus. How have you been? Really. Reply o. This is not a soliloquy, that’s what the comment box is for.

If you hate predictability like I do, then kudos for clicking on this post. I mean, I most probably would not want to read just another New year-New resolutions-New me horse poo; especially since a whole lot of articles and write-ups on this same thing would have been flying around. Therefore, if you clicked on this post, that means you’re either very absent minded or an ardent seeker of knowledge. Brethren, if you’re part of the latter, thumbs up. Curiosity didn’t really kill the cat, you’d know that if you were curious.

Now, on a serious note, a lot of us waltz into the new year happy and rejoicing because well, it is wonderful to be part of something new. It is a little bit like that feeling you get when you move into a new house or buy a new gadget or something. There is something to look forward to- a world of endless possibilities. However, as it has always happened to us, the possibilities get dimmer and farther from our reach every single second of the New Year - all of a sudden, we run out of time.

I bring to you great news; the same thing is going to happen this year and every other year. Yeah. How does that sound? Not so great, huh? But it’s the truth and we all know it. It’s high time we started to pick up the slack and get our heads into the action before it passes us by. While you are sitting and staring, people are doing meaningful things with their lives; breaking records and leaping through hurdles. For how long will you keep dancing and rejoicing because of the New Year when your life is really fading away?

While I am not saying we should not be grateful for seeing 2016, our gratefulness should come with intention- purpose. Do not quickly discard the New Year, New Me thing if it would actually help you to become a better person. Stop sleeping. Start doing something meaningful. Don’t deceive yourself- acknowledge your maker. Solve a problem. Help someone. And if you are already doing something meaningful, that’s great. You’re a boss. However, remember that’s yesterday’s food will become stale someday, so you have to keep at it. Trust me, there is always more to achieve.

THINK. ACT. MAKE AN AMAZING DIFFERENCE. Let yourself be great this year, fam.

Have a meaningful 2016.

NUT

INDECIPHERABLE

She woke up with an unusual bout of sickness,the nauseous feeling,the incessant pounding in her head..she ran to the toilet to try vomiting,she vomited all sort of things

"eeew..I wonder how my gut looks up close"

She had been experiencing what seemed like a migraine for few days,

"it's probably nothing,it's just the stress." she assured herself.

She ran to the medicine shelf,took out one of the medicine bottles and popped some pills into her mouth. The house suddenly started twirling,she felt like she was in a tunnel,round and round she went till all became blank.

She woke up several hours later,she found herself on the floor. She tried remembering what had happened and then it hit her,she had woken up that morning having her usual symptoms of sickness,

"Am I pregnant?"She thought.."No,it's not possible,I haven't even had sex,it's malaria,I can't be pregnant"she finally concluded.

She brushed her teeth,made her usual morning glass of milk and downed it in a gulp and then went into the bathroom to take her bath. She dressed up as quickly as she could,pulled on her old sweater and her faded jeans and ran out of the house without making an effort to change her slippers. She walked down the street and flagged down a bike..."Iya alagbo".
She didn't like injection,she hated needles with passion which left her to the fate of herbal concortion. Within 10minutes,she was at Iya alagbo's shop.. Iya alagbo was a very popular herb and concortion seller in the heart of Ibadan. She was patronized on daily basis by the rich and poor people in the society. The rate at which she was patronized never ceased to amaze people..Since she got there early,she was able to see Iya alagbo herself.

"Ekaro mama,hope you are good ma?"

"Kaaro omo mi"she replied,she probably decided to ignore the strings of english words that followed,she understood english but just couldn't speak much.

"Mama I think I am having malaria symptoms,ara mi o ya(I am not feeling fine)"

"Ara re o ya?ki ni awon nkan ti o n ri?(What are the symptoms you are having?)"

"Headache,ebi ma n gbe mi(I usually feel nauseated),I sometimes feel sharp pains around my stomach region"

"Se otutu ma n mu eh ni,your body dey hot?(Do you always feel feverish?)"

"Yes mama,I get feverish a lot of time too"

"Ah iba lo ma fe je yen(I think it might be malaria)"agbo ati agumu ni ah ma fun eh(you will be given herbal concortion)"

"Alright mama,eshey gan ni(thanks a lot)"

"Sugbon mu owo re wa(stretch forth your hands)"

Iya alagbo checked her palms and even opened her eyelids but saw nothing unusual. She was just taking precautions,no stone could be left unturned but she was relieved to know that the young girl hadn't taken in. There was something about the girl,she looked lost and helpless and her heart reached out to her.

"Iba ni,o dami loju" Iya alagbo said reassuringly. She packed the herbs and other things into a polythene bag after which the lady paid the money and took her leave.
She got home and followed everything iya alagbo said and surprisingly she started getting better....."now I can finally go about my activities without the usual feeling of fatigue"...she said to herself on a sunday night.


LET US GET TO KNOW HER
Her name is Tomide Ajibade. She was in every sense a beauty,with her almond shaped eyes and a heart shaped face,a smile that could work up the heat in a man,she had everyone hooked. She was loved by all,she was an only child but an orphan. Her parents died when she was age eighteen. Her world came crashing the day they died in a fire that broke out in their home,the cause of the fire was never established. She was left with nothing. They were never rich but they were quite comfortable. They never grumbled and they served God like he was created only for them. They lived by the rules and never faltered. Her views about God changed that fateful night. She wished her father hadn't stopped her from coming home that weekend,she wished she had died in that inferno with them,life was cold,the world wasn't a place to be.
Her only source of comfort was her boyfriend,Kola,he loved her and helped her get through that dark phase of her life and even though she remained withdrawn and cold to him and everyone,he never left her. He forgave all her excesses and still prayed for her to be healed because he knew she was vulnerable on the inside. He became her parent,he was all she had left. She had just 3 years to finally becoming an adult,she was still fragile and naïve. He covered her expenses and even got her an apartment to stay outside school so she wouldn't feel pressured at any time. He was so sweet to her,she literally owed him her life and existence.
She kept to herself,lost all her friends because everyone thought she being overly reactive to all that had happened,they considered her a tard too bitchy. She was grateful they all left her alone though,it gave her time to think and stop silly chats and gossips girls engaged in.
Kola finally left her,he cheated on her with someone else,he was totally convinced she had become ice itself and there was no way to get through her,she seemed so impregnable. She understood and she let him go. She became numb afterwards,picked up menial jobs to survive and see herself through university.

I met her on a beautiful Monday morning. Her beauty got me drooling,I moved closer to compliment her and realized she looked lost. A closer look and I saw tears flowing down her face,our friendship started that day. I became her wall,her rock,I comforted her and every time she was alone,I was quick to rid her of her empty feelings. I was like a sister she never had.

That's pretty much all about her. SHE WAS NO BITCH,SHE WAS JUST MISUNDERSTOOD!


She got back to school and resumed work almost immediately. A month,two,she was still doing very fine.
The headache came back a day to christmas,she attributed it to stress once again.."just the bustling and excitement of the season"she said..she got through christmas but the days that followed,she spent in pain. On the eve of new year,she slumped.

She woke up to see white walls,the sound of beeping machines kept making her head pound,she was wired around with drips,needles were stuck into her body at all side,it was a surprise she could still breathe on her own. She screamed and tried to get free but the nurses came running through the door just in time to hold her down. The doctor followed and I came in with eyes stained with tears and a red nose for I had been crying.

"I demand to know why I am here"she screamed.

"It's okay darling,you will be alright." the nurses cooed and gave reassuring smiles.

"It happens every now and then but it's nothing to worry about,you can still go about your activities in the little time you have left."the doctor said.

She looked around and returned her gaze to the doctor's face,she was petrified but did a good job of looking calm.."What is really wrong with me",she finally asked.

"I'm sorry Tomide but it seems you have.." the doctor was about completing his sentence when I halted him with a loud cry...."nooo!stop all this!do you want to kill her in this state,please do not tell her"I begged.

"Shut up,all of you"she screamed.

They all kept mum with bewildered looks on their faces..when she saw she had the attention of all,she spoke,"now tell me what this is about,I have a right to know."

"I am sorry Tomide but you have cancer"the doctor said.

"Cancer?Cancer..Cancer,no no no!"she screamed.

She seemed to think about it and finally said"what type of cancer?"

"It is the cancer of the blood,leukemia"the doctor said with a startled cry.

She looked from my face to the nurses faces and saw us struggling to hold back tears,we all wanted to be strong for her.

"How long do I have?"She asked.

The doctor heaved a sigh,hesitated and finally said.."two months."

"Two months?what the hell?why two months?but..I.."She stopped as I broke down in tears,I cried and ran out of the room,it was too much to bear.

Still keeping a calm face,she asked"any chance you could slow down the cancerous growth doc?drugs?chemo?oh,I totally forgot I'm impoverished,I can't even afford that". She said with a short laughter.

"You.."the doctor started but was cut off with a scoff.

"never mind doc,save it for an undying patient."

"If it's okay by you,I will like to rest now,I sure need it,don't I?"She said with sarcasm.

The doctor made a move to leave the room..."and hey doc,tell my friend to come in,I would also love to be discharged by tomorrow and please do not argue with me,it is my life." she said with a wink.

She left the hospital the next day and two days after,she went to Iya alagbo's place to say goodbye.

"Mama,Ekaro."

"Ah,bawo ni omo mi(how are you my child?),o t'ojo meta(it's been a long while),shey ara re si ti ya gaga(and I hope you are now alright?)"

"Beeni mama,iba ti lo(the fever is gone) but mama I was diagnosed with something deadly 3 days ago."

A look of shock replaced the calm look on Iya alagbo's face as Tomide gave her the details of all that had happened in the last few days.

"Jejere(cancer)." Iya alagbo said in a whisper.


Few days later,she called me to come over,..."I do not want you to be here when I die so I insist you stop coming to pay me visits."

I protested but my grumbling fell on deaf ears..."you can't do this to me Tomide,I have to be here with you,you need me babe."

She smiled.."will you refuse a dying girl her last wish?please do not. Oh,one last thing,I want this as an epitaph"FUCK LIFE" sweet right?make sure you do that or my spirit will haunt you down,okay?"

I shrieked with laughter which later turned into loud sobs..."I will miss you babe,I love you so much you know that right?"

"Of course you do silly,I love you too..now scoot and leave a dying girl some time to prepare for her long journey."

We said our final goodbyes and blew kisses with tears in our eyes..."hey I'm serious about that epitaph." she called back.
I nodded and ran out of the door.

She heaved a sigh and let out a loud cry,she moved to the mirror and saw an image she had come to live with in the past few weeks. She had been reduce to a frail and thin ghost,her skin had lost it glow and was just cracked and white,the pain was unbearable,she prayed for death to take her and quit stalling.


Ain't no doctor or therapeutic that. can take the pain away
The pain's inside
And nobody frees you from your body
It's the soul that needs surgery
It's my soul that needs surgey
Plastic smile and denial can only take you so far
And you break when the paper signs you in the dark
You left a shattered mirror
And the shards of a beautiful girl
Pretty hurts


On the 7th of March,She died in the comfort of her room. I mourned her,Iya alagbo who had started making a visit to her house everyday before she died mourned her also,she was also all we had.
Oh!and the epitaph,I did write exactly what she asked and I still laugh out loud whenever my eyes catch the phrase while laying flowers on her grave every last friday of the month.
I still wish she didn't die of cancer,she suffered a lot,what a beautiful soul she was..The demise of her parents wasn't enough,the loss she suffered wasn't enough,life still dealt her a final blow..am I happy she is no more?I guess I am,at least she has peace now*smiles*..
Life isn't fair and our God remains a mystery,he is INDECIPHERABLE,AWAMARIDI.


******************************
**************
Hi amazing readers,I hope you all enjoyed this piece?it isn't really about you enjoying it,it is to let you know the pain that exists beyond imagination...There are a lot of Tomides out there,cancer kills daily and it doesn't attack adults alone contrary to your beliefs,it attacks anyone and at any age..and not only the rich or "ajebutter" develop cancer like most people think,even the poor "ajepaki" also has a high risk...PREVENTION IS BETTER THAN CURE!!!
Your smile and prayer can do a lot to lessen the pain of many,show love to everyone in any way you can.
Happy New Year once again. Ich Liebe Dich.

Kitty.

Interview with GREAT OKEKE

It is a beautiful day in the much awaited 2016 and I'm wishing you a Happy new year and the best the year has to offer. To kick-start our series of interview for the year 2016,i present to you an interview with a great visionary, unique innovator, a man of great change and a man of a rare name and adjective- GREAT. Great is a graduate of History and International studies of the Osun State University and the brain behind Africa's own unique brand-B.O.P

Kitty: Hi handsome ,how are you doing today?

Great :I'm fine Kitty, you?

Kitty: I'm great like your name says. So briefly tell us about Great.

Great: I am Great Olumide Chuwkufumnaya Okeke, also known as OluGr8. A native of Enugu state, the first of 4 children, with girls as siblings. A graduate of History and International studies, Osun State University.

Kitty: Your name is rare you know, never heard of someone that goes by that name. So tell me what made your parents give you such a name.

Great: Well there is this politician my dad loves. He also ran for the gubernatorial elections in Delta state, Great Ogboro. That was when my name came from plus my mum says my coming to this world was a big deal so it just fits. This name is just for me and God help me I live up to the name.

Kitty: A big amen to that. So how is life as a graduate?

Great: Honestly as a graduate, I miss the pressure of having to submit an assignment at a deadline , I miss the presentations also the general school life. But then I have the time to pursue and discover myself now. The graduate life is good and it's something every student looks forward to.

INTERVIEW WITH SIR KENAYO OF KENAYO.COM

HELLUR beautiful people, happy new mid month*winks* and welcome to another awesome interview session with one of the fast rising bloggers in Nigeria. We all know him as Sir Kenayo of Kenayo.com but is that all there is to him? Learn more,know more and if you have had a wrong view about him in the past,now is the time to CHANGE IT because this dude here is one amazing personality. YOU READY?????????????????

Suliat: Good afternoon Mister Popular,how are you doing today?

Kenayo: Good afternoon to you too,I’m fine,thank you.

Suliat: Great we have heard so much about you.Your name has become a household name especially in the University of Ibadan. So tell us,who is Sir Kenayo?

Kenayo: Well Kenayo is Kehinde Ayodeji, so “ken” is coined from Kehinde and “ayo” is gotten from my surname,Ayodedji. I am a University of Ibadan student,300 level,Sociology.

Suliat: How and when did the idea of a blog occur to you?

Kenayo: I think I like to write,initially that was what propelled me to start blogging,I had a passion for writing and so I would write in a jotter and sketch certain stuff. Later someone told me that there is something called wordpress,so I opened an account and started writing and blogging from there. The only reason I was serious with blogging then was the fact that I was always bored and I also had access to the internet from a very young age and so I took advantage of that.

Suliat: Nice. So what do you think makes your blog so different from other blogs?

Kenayo: Errr initially when I started blogging,my blog was basically about humor . In 2011,my blog got nominated in Nigeria Blog Award as Humor Blog of the year. What makes the blog distinct is our presentation,we try to make our news not too serious and so we present it in a cheerful,casual way everyone can relate with. If you check out the blog,you will see that there is a way we make out titles catchy. The blog is one of the few blogs in Nigeria that does music,videos,movies,series download,it has basically everything. We basically just make life easy,we know people love Empirer and some other interesting series,so what do we do? Instead of making them go through the stress of downloading on other sites and having to pay more,we just bring it to them.

Suliat: How do you plan on keeping the blog up after graduation?

Kenayo: Thank God for the blog,it is not really for students,it's for everyone,student or not. When I’m done with school,Wizkid would not tell me to stop posting,likewise Dbanj. So there really isn’t going to be any problem blogging after school.

Suliat: How do you combine blogging with school work?

Kenayo: It is very easy actually,just plan your time. Though the business suffers atimes,I could be very slow or late with my news but then I have extra hands. You can just make life easier for yourself and employ extra hands and plan your time well. Let’s say you have a class from 10 to 11,before then,put up something your blog,when you are done with class,put up something on your blog.

Suliat: What makes a successful blogger?

Kenayo: Being able to break news,being able to give people what they want. Most people just do copy and paste on their blogs,if you keep doing that,you would make no difference. So to me,being successful comes from your ability to stay in line and in tune with what goes on in your society. If D’banj drops a song today,as a good blogger,you are supposed to put it up within the next 5 minutes,that’s the way we run the blog here but if you are posting it 48hours later,you will be seen as being unserious because by then almost everyone would have downloaded it. So you have to keep track of things that are happening around you and then remain updated and connected to the internet.

Suliat: So what are the challenges you face as a blogger?

Kenayo: In the time past when I started blogging,I had the problem of web hosting. It was so expensive at the beginning,I didn’t really know much about web hosting and so I was exploited by the guy hosting for me. There is something called bandwith and domain name and so he would call me to tell me my bandwith had expired. Then I could pay for the same thing twice in a month and so I fell for their scam continuously. I also didn’t know how to gauge my traffic and so I couldn’t decipher how much traffic I was supposed to have and so I could pay for 10,000 viewers in a month when infact I had 20,000 and then at the middle of the month,my site would go offline. So I was just running at a loss at that period and then the internet was also a problem,the broadband was very pathetic and we still face that challenge even now. There is also this problem that comes with having people on your team,dispute arise over different views and then threat of pulling out surfaces,leaving you to face all the problems by yourself. Another problem is getting people to know about your blog and read it.

Suliat: Yeah right,so true. So tell us,what do you think of President Buhari and his idea of change as regards probing senators and his war against corruption?

Kenayo: Alright,right from the start,I didn’t like the President. I thought he was coming to seek revenge and so I voted for GEJ.You know now during Jonathan’s time,dollar was very high*winks*,it was 240 and it was good for me,now it’s 225. I get paid in dollars,so the higher it is,the higher my profit is. Believe me,let’s put sentiments aside,if you are earning in dollar,you won’t really be worried about the rate exchange. But then,back to Buhari,I thought he was going to be a dictator because he once was. But then the idea of him probing people is very ni ce. Our leaders need this. I mean imagine this Deziani woman,the amount of money she stole is so outrageous. We all know it is inevitable,they all keep money for theselves,they steal with brain but when it starts getting so noticeable,then are overdoing it and they should be punished.Light is better now infact if you check my fridge,you are not going to see a drop of water,everything there is iced. So I agree and think Buhari is good for us,he is working. Probing is going to curtail their greed. EFCC,ICPC can’t do much and so with this new method,the politicians will always have it in mind that once they steal or embezzle money,they will be probed. By the way Diezani stole billion of dollars that can feed generations,if I want to steal,I will settle for just 700 million naira,at least that’s like a drop compared to the ocean she stole..lol..just joking oh. Anyway,once they know that there is someone watching them,they would be able to steal with sense and then give back to us.

Suliat: *laughs out loud* Okay oooo. So do you think we should expect more from Buhari or do you rather think he might stop at a point in time,seeing that some people think he is going too fast or better still,this could be an act,so he makes second term.

Kenayo: Forget second term oh,baba don old. I’m not saying he is going to die sha but you know certain things come with old age,dementia and some other things. I mean there was a time he was with Obama and he wanted to say APC,he mentioned the name of his former party,there were lot of discrepancies in what he was saying. However,I believe he is strong,he is going to keep fighting hard for what he believes in and I believe if a better person step into his shoes when he is gone,by the time I am 30 years of age,Nigeria should be where we want her to be,let’s just pray I'm not over 30 by then. Anyhow,by then we would be chilling and balling.*chuckles*

Suliat: *laughs*,let us talk about your award,how many awards have you won?

Kenayo: I don’t know,can’t remember,and don’t get me wrong oh,I am not saying it’s uncountable but then I don’t keep count. There were some I didn’t go for and reason is majorly because I don’t really like to be seen. How many times have you seen me even here in school? I am shy,but people don’t understand that and they take that for pride. They really cant differentiate between a proud dude and one that just likes keeping to himself.

Suliat: Are you an introvert?

Kenayo: I won’t call myself that because I relate well with people once we are acquainted. I have noticed people tend to watch me a lot,they do that to find something to say,so the best way to give them nothing to say is by keeping to myself but that is also so impossible cos when you try that,they even say worse. If I greet too much,it is called “famzing”,if I don’t,it is pride,if I’m driving and I greet,they say I am just trying to show off my new car,if I’m driving and I don’t greet,I am just arrogant that was even the main reason I had to go and tint my car windows,so I won’t have to greet anybody. At least if they don’t see my face,they won’t know it is me.

Suliat: *laughs*people would always talk. So tell us ,what keeps you going, what makes you tick, what brings the inspiration?

Kenayo: MONEY!...*laughs* don’t let me lie. Jesus gives me inspiration *chuckles* initially it was the passion , I mean I didn’t even know there was money in blogging, I never knew till when a girl pinged me one day to ask that I post her song on my blog. After that, she asked for my account number and I was like “for what” and then she was like to “pay you for your work now”. I was like "Oh,Wow! So they pay people for this?" So after the “passionate part’’ of me took a seat , money became the drive and so everything I do now, I ask myself, “what am I going to gain from this?” Be it song posting or advertisement , what do I get from it either in cash or exchange of services. Passion won’t build you a house or buy you a car,it won’t do lot of things for you after a while. I blogged for fun for like two years till someone noticed me and thought me cool. Blogging is actually fun for me though, there was a time my folks used to beg me to leave the house cos I was always on my laptop. I just found it cool ,being in a corner ,talking to millions of people across the world. However ,my drive was making people happy, relaxed through my less serious, informal blog and that brought about my 1st blog. Also my readers drive me to do more. For instance, there was this day I was walking on campus and a guy suddenly approached me and was like, ”guy ,you haven’t posted in two weeks ,what’s up?” and I was like “Oh, Wow! so you guys actually anticipate”. So things like that actually makes you not want to mess up.

Suliat: Oookaii. So tell us about the most embarrassing moment of your life.

Kenayo: You see ehn, in 100 level, attention wasn’t really on me like that but I was kind of popular. So one day, I woke up, got up from my bed to go take my bath and prepare for CHE 157 but there was no water. So I picked my bucket to go fetch from the tap. I don’t know what happened to my boxers oh ,it sha tore, and my bum was showing. Thank God it was a male hostel, Kuti hall. So I carried my keg oh. One boy now saw me, he did not even call me to a private place to tell me ,he just said “guy, your yansh is showing oh.” I ran back upstairs sha and changed. This things happen jare, there are times that people forget to zip, so everyone has his or her own moment. But people did not really see oh, they didn’t ,I’m very certain.

Suliat:*laughs out loud* so tell us about the worst date of your life, a date gone bad?

Kenayo: Dates? I don’t really go on dates,the dates you see around here is the “ventura kind of date” ,see a movie, grab pop corns. I have never really had an embarrassing date before. I don’t go out with wasteful or uncouth girls,I mean no guy wants a girl that keeps asking for more and can’t control her mouth or appetite but then if such ever happens sef,there ia always an ATM somewhere and a card in hand.

Suliat: Oh,but what if you have set aside a certain amount to spend and don’t intend spending more? What if you don’t even have money in your account but then the girl keeps ordering? Have you met a girl like that?

Kenayo: Yes oh,but I won’t mention her name before they say I’m proud. But then, in such cases, you have no choice but to withdraw,how much stuff does she wanna eat that I cant afford? Jesus has covered that. *chuckles* and about not having money in my account,that is not possible, Jesus has already covered that for me. But then I don’t like to go out with girls that are too materialistic,so I take out girls that are sensible in their dealings.



Suliat: *laughs out loud* Okay o. So how do you think girls regard you?

Kenayo: I think they hate me!

Suliat: Haaa! Why? What makes you think they do?

Kenayo: I don’t know how to answer this question,but I was just kidding earlier when I said that. I don’t think they hate me. I don’t know but I think any young guy that is fairly presentable, fairly ambitious and fairly successful wouldn’t be loathed by girls. I don’t know oh, it’s just what I think. Or better still, does this count? You passing by and you see three girls sitting and tapping themselves,do you think it means they like you or otherwise?

Suliat: of course,it means the babes are tripping but then it could be bad also. But then,knowing your kind of person,do you think they say good things about you?*winks*

Kenayo: Judging from what I have heard,they are good things. Apart from the fact that I have heard I am a player,I think most girls like me. The ones that don’t are those who think I am proud. Okay let me ask you this,do you get turned on by successful and hardworking guys?

Suliat: Yeah,sure.

Kenayo: Right,then you have answered for all girls. Which means they like me and regard me highly. Smart girls though,not the ones that are usually looking for one baba driving G-wagon somewhere.

Suliat: *chuckles*. Okay o. Play boy or Good boy as regards what girls think of guys in University of Ibadan? Because believe me,most girls here are usually like they can never date a guy in UI.

Kenayo: It’s a lie, don’t mind them, those girls that usually say that,we know what’s up oh. See we try,yeah we do but then for someone like me, Yosola(YSL), we are quite popular and so people will assume rather quickly. So let’s say I have a girlfriend and I want to be loyal to her,there is always that girl lurking somewhere and then makes it difficult for you. For me,if a girl likes me,I have to like her back because I don’t like hurting people’s feelings. I mean who will read the blog for you,send bcs for you? See girls are not nice,keep turning the down or chasing them away and they will spoil business for you. Who will do the work for you then? So I think the best thing for you is just to stay single or strike a convenient deal with a girl who is not a talker. Just kidding oh. But sha,I am not a player,I am just a cool person, a good boy. Okay, let’s just say I am in between. I have so many female friends,that doesn’t mean I am a player,but in UI,they like to assume too much. Lift a girl,drop her in front of her hall and before you knowing it,people start saying something must have gone down. These are some of the things you have to cope with in UI,but at least I will soon be done.

Suliat: Yeah,right. So tell us Kenayo,do you think you are a people’s man or otherwise?

Kenayo: Well,I don’t really know….err…how do I explain this? Thing is you cannot be you for everybody . A set of people will surely like me, some won’t ,others would be indifferent. It is to be expected but then on the average, I would say I’m for the people ,by the people..*laughs* I don’t know sha but judging from my last birthday party,I had over 120 people in attendance cos we made 100 pieces of chicken from Jay,it ran out and some people were still coming to say ,they hadn’t eaten. So judging from that, I don’t know how naïve that might look or sound,I think I am a people’s person. Let’s say half of the people sha,we are still trying to convince the other half that we are not proud. But then I think once you are successful and you have little change,some people just hate you for no reason. Atimes ,you would just ask someone why he or she hates you and the he or she goes like,”err,I don’t know,he didn’t actually do anything but then I just don’t like the boy”. I just feel they just don’t understand me and if you dec ide to prove people wrong and talk to them too much,they start crossing their boundary and they disrespect you. Therein lies the problem because I love to have my respect.

Suliat: That is very true. I guess you should just stick to being yourself. Alright,let’s take this a little personal. Who is the lucky girl?

Kenayo: Lucky girl?girls are always fucking up oh. You think you have found one lucky girl and then days later, you fightand break up. But please i’m single,don’t come and spoil parole for me. My mum is the lucky girl,whrn I find the lucky girl,you people will start seeing her pictures on instagram or on the blog when we announce the wedding date..

Suliat: *laughs out loud* So what is the most awkward rumor you ever heard about yourself?

Kenayo: Yahoo yahoo oooo. After I got my car,weeks later,I heard I was doing yahoo yahoo. UI people though,I’m tired of you guys. EPs is what you guys are. When somebody was hustling that year,nobody saw oh,when I was saving money,they didn’t see me then oh,now that I have a car,I'm doing yahoo yahoo but God dey sha.

Suliat: *chuckles*,sorry about that,quite funny though. So apart from blogging,what do you do?

Kenayo: Apart from blogging,I do PR for artiste , social media analyst for companies,I set trend on twitter, I run online campaign for brands and I was recently certified by Google.

Suliat: Wow! that is great. So Kenayo,just where do you see yourself in 5 years time?

Kenayo: I see myself having a house,a home,would have added marriage but after much thoughts and calculation,that isn’t feasible. In 5 years,I should have an office, step out from the online jobs but before then,I want to go into digital marketing,brand building and start big works generally. By then I should be handling big campaigns in the world.I don’t want to be the male version of Linda Ikeji though,I want to try other things out apart from blogging. I want to try my hands on business. Let’s just see how it goes. Blogging pays a lot though,my car is strictly from blogging money. Lets say my monthly income can be compared to that which a UI doctor gets monthly. I just want to be rich in 5 years time,a billionaire,that’s the dream. I also want to have a snail farm,just want to delve into agriculture,have people work for me.

Suliat: Na you o,jack of all things that drags the dough in. So please,a word of advise to the Nigerian youths.

Kenayo: Stop doing yahoo yahoo. Let people like me be free to drive our cars down the streets of Bodija without being harassed by the police for being too young and cool. There are other things you can do one the internet that are not illegal, try that out or get a job. Let us also learn to create work for ourselves,hustle justly,make clean money and face your books while still in school even if you will hustle.

Suliat: Thank you so much Kehinde Ayodeji, Sir Kenayo. It has really been a pleasure talking to you. Do you have anything to say to TheFACET readers?

Kenayo: Yes,I do. To the readers, stay tuned,always come back to this blog. It is unique. Enjoy it and support them in any way you can,send bcs on their behalf and tell a friend to tell a friend,let the cycle flow. Thank you.

And that would be all on Star column for today. I hope you didn’t blink while reading that? If you did,go back and read again. Till next time,we remain TheFACET,intertwining and connecting people from all walks of life. Muchaha!